The Best College Essay Intros That Actually Worked

March 31, 2016

If you’re starting to give some thought as to what you should write about in your college application essay, remember: admissions officers have thousands of application essays to read. That means you need to have an essay introduction that will grab your reader’s attention, even if they just give it a quick glance. In the midst of the Class of 2020’s acceptance, we bring to you some of the best college essay examples that actually worked:

A.oh29

Washington University in St. Louis (St. Louis, MO)

When I was six years old, I loved to lie down on a grassy hillside by my house and stare at the clouds, anticipating what animal or object I might be able to discern in the white, whispy wonderland. My mind swirled with these breathtaking figures; they were astronomical. As a rebellious child, I sought cloud-watching to escape my seemingly monotonous home life. Even now, I will never become bored from just staring at the blue yonder. Read on.

Mit_student_45

Massachusetts Institute of Technology (Cambridge, MA)

All my life I’ve been stuck right in the middle between fitting in and feeling completely different from everybody else. It wasn’t easy making friends as that kid who got dropped off by his “abuela” every morning at a primarily white elementary school, and then again as the only “Americano” after my family relocated to Tlaxcala, Mexico……. At the time, I didn’t realize how many of my differences were actually strengths, but the real hindrance about this was that neither did anyone around me. View profile.

serena2020

Harvard University (Cambridge, MA)

.   .   . I recently helped clean up around Cody High School with my church. I had long looked forward to doing mission work in inner-city Detroit and this was the perfect opportunity. As I picked up litter from highways and around abandoned houses near Cody, I couldn’t help wondering about the kids there. Through some radio podcasts, I learned about the dire academic and graduation outcomes of Codies. Continue reading.

  

Grant2020

University of Pennsylvania (Philadelphia, PA)

It was a dark and stormy night — but actually, it was.

A new tradition arose a few years ago at our band camp, the Hunger Games (don’t worry, there is absolutely no murder involved); it is an amalgamation of small, seemingly-pointless minute-to-win-it games that pit the different sections of the band against each other, proving who truly has the most spirit. Continue Reading.

C.smith20

Middlebury College (Middlebury, VT)

Everyone knows the old saying “How do you get to Carnegie Hall? Practice; Practice; Practice!” Never in a million years did I imagine that would ever be true for me. Maybe it was some arbitrary alignment of the cosmos, or maybe it was a choice. Choices as simple as what to have for breakfast can change our lives. They can affect us in ways we never imagined; they can change the very fabric of our existence. Read on

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About The Author

Frances Wong
Frances Wong

Frances was born in Hong Kong and received her bachelor’s degree from Georgetown University. She loves super sad drama television, cooking, and reading. Her favorite person on Earth isn’t actually a member of the AdmitSee team - it’s her dog Cooper.

 




Browse Successful Application Files

w_quan
Harvard ‘20


Accepted to Harvard

Excited about the world.
b_rod
Harvard ‘20


Accepted to Harvard, Yale, MIT, Columbia, UVA

Lover of physics, math, and chess. Football player and bass player. California born and raised.
theginger
Harvard ‘21


Accepted to Harvard, Yale, Brown, UPenn, Bowdoin, Amherst, Wesleyan, Georgetown, BC, Swarthmore

Hi! I'm a prospective Neuroscience and Religion double major. I love to sing, run, and help others.
mark_pino
UPenn ‘20


Accepted to UPenn

Hello! I'm a Freshman at the University of Pennsylvania Wharton School. I plan on concentrating in finance, marketing and social impact. In high school I was active in LGBTQ advocacy and music. I can help with any questions you have about admissions

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